Orrin Hatch — God Help Us All

Thursday, July 14th, 2005 12:03 am by Neal

Earlier today I listened to an interview with Utah Senator Orrin Hatch on the Sean Hannity show. They were discussing the upcoming battle over the President’s Supreme Court nomination to replace retiring Justice Sandra Day O’Connor and the importance of getting a true conservative on the Court given the Supreme blunders of the last 50 years.

As one would expect from a senior, Republican Senator, Hatch was calm throughout the discussion, boasting of his tenure and experience confirming Supreme Court nominations. However, at one point Hatch expressed outrage at a particular Court decision that he is passionate about — one that hits him in the gut. “What could it be?” you ask. God and Orrin know there are plenty of bad court decisions to be outraged at, but what sets off the rough and tough Orrin Hatch of rough and rugged Utah? Are you ready?

Flag Desecration.

Hatch was livid that Justice Scalia upheld Flag desecration as protected expression under the First Amendment.


Hatch exclaimed that desecrating the US flag with urine or burning “is offensive!” Indeed Senator, because the flag is a popular political symbol, desecrating it is an offensive act of personal, political expression — the type protected by the First Amendment. Popular writings, speeches, posters, cartoons, songs, plays and such need no protection, but the Constitution protects the despicable and lovable alike. Ask yourself Senator — if someone burns their flag, in what way does that rob you of your life, liberty or property?

Of all the preposterous laws, policies, and Supreme Court decisions, this is what enrages a senior Republican Senator? God help us all. Here are four contemporary outrages to accompany Senator Hatch’s. Rank these in importance as they pertain to you and your family.

  1. A fraudulent scheme that siezes 15% of every penny you will ever make in this world, redistributes that money largely to people who didn’t earn it, and is perpetuated by scaring dependent retirees, all while having the double-speak moniker of “Social Security.”
  2. Islamic Fascists who number perhaps in the millions worldwide, all of whom are content to die (and do so quite regularly) in order to subjugate the entire world to their fanatical religion.
  3. A “progressive” Income Tax that punishes people the harder they work yet rewards them to sit on their ass, which sucks billions per year from our economy in compliance, enforced by a semi-autonomous, largely-unnaccountable authoritarian beaurocracy called the Internal Revenue Service (IRS) that invades every “free” citizen’s bank accounts in order to preserve a tax system that would make Karl Marx proud.
  4. The recent Supreme Court decision (in Kelo vs City of New London) that nullified one of the central and most cherished American ideals that your home is your castle. Students of History will note that this revoked ideal was formerly known as The American Dream.
  5. A graduate art student at Berkely or Harvard who, in front of his committee and maybe a few students, pisses on an American flag.

Hmmmmm……if you’re like me, the flag pissing is on the bottom of the list, but not being a US Senator, I am ignorant about what matters to the constituents of such an important, and distinguished, elected representative.

Whew. Thank God my opinions are so inconsequential compared to Senator Hatch’s. Otherwise, we would be up shit creek.

Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.

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